I Just Can't

Tonight is one of those nights when I just can't.
You know, there's wet laundry in the washing machine that needs to be moved to the dryer.
And clean clothes that wait on your bed to be folded.
But you just can't.
I should really do myself a favor and pick up the books and shoes and children's drawings of star wars battles and princesses scattered all over the living room floor.
Because don't you love waking up to a clean living room, ready to start the day?
But I just can't.
You know the saying, "whether you think you can or you think you can't, You're right?" Henry Ford or someone really ambitious and perseverant said it. I don't think perseverant is a word, but it should be.

Well anyway, tonight I think I can't so I can't. And I'm enjoying "can'ting".

So I waste time on the computer and eat two granola bars and a handful of chocolate chips because they are the closest things resembling sweets that I have in my house right now.
(I'm on a diet) A handful-or-two-of-chocolate-chips-a-day-diet. The granola bars were an Indulgence because I've been so good lately. Just eating chocolate chips.

Isn't mediocrity blissful sometimes??

Usually when I feel like I can't, I look up homeschooling stuff because I'm a nerd and that's fun for me, or I read a good book. But, I just finished my book a few hours ago and tonight even that sounds too productive for me.

So, I let the can'tness wash over me. And I enjoy seeing the squiggly, red lines under all my misspelled, made up words.

And I just can't go to bed on time even though we just resolved two days ago to go to bed earlier. I have to admit I felt a little discouraged when I woke up at 5 am sharp the first morning of the "early to bed and early to rise" goal only to hear my 6 and 2 year old cheerily carrying on a conversation about spiderwebs. What's the point when it just means two more hours of one-sided spiderweb conversations instead of the quiet, meditative time you were hoping for?
(I did manage to tiptoe past their room and stay downstairs for a 1/2 hour while my wonderful hubby sat on the couch with said children and (as he put it) "just listened".)

Anyway, I'm done can'ting. My heart is willing to can't all night, but my body is weak and even can'ting is taking it's toll. Can'ting can be work too, you know.

So, I can go to bed now.

And I have to confess that I CAN actually move the wet laundry over to the dryer before heading to bed.
After all, I "just can't" do mildew-smelling clothes even more than I "just can't" get off my lazy bum to put them in the dryer.

Good night!